Boxed
by x The Chichi Slaughter House x
Summary: Luffy's been captured by the marines, so it's up to the other Strawhats to rescue him! With Usopp leading them in, Zoro and Sanji are...trapped in a crate? ZoroxSanji. -Oneshot-


**Boxed**

By The Chichi Slaughter House

**Warnings:** ZoroxSanji, non-con molesting, yaoi, attempted humour, situation not fully explained (but I'm sure you can figure out what's going on).

**Disclaimer:** I don't own One Piece~

**Rating:** PG-13

Blatantly inspired by episode two of Koihime Musou.

--

He didn't know how he got into these situations, really he didn't.

Squashed up against cool wood bent in an uncomfortable position, the air stuffy and smelling of sweat and heat and worst of all, a horny swordsman pressed up against his back. He could feel Zoro's breath hot on his neck and shuddered as hands cupped his hips as he felt the idiot's own pressing harder against his ass than they were moments before. Teeth scraped his shoulder and he cursed the situation more and more, not retaliating only because it would blow their cover.

If they even made a sound, the marines might hear them and decide to investigate the contents of the crate Usopp was taking through the gates at this very moment. It had been fine getting in – though he could _not_ say he was pleased at the company – and it had been alright when the sniper had nailed the lid down. He hadn't freaked out in the slightest either, though he wasn't fond of the less than spacious surroundings. But now that Zoro had decided to get so damn _friendly_ all of a sudden, he was really feeling the claustrophobia, along with a strong desire to kick Zoro in the face. It fucking sucked that he couldn't.

If this shit carried on much longer, he was going to say 'screw it' to the rescue Luffy plan and kick the hell out of the bastard anyway. Zoro's hands had started to roam already, and he was staying silent only by biting hard on his bottom lip as one tried to push down the front of his pants. What the fuck did the swordsman even think he was doing at a time like this?! The vibrations through the floor told him they were still moving, and that meant he could not burst out of the stupid crate yet, so he held on, putting up with the molesting a bit longer. But when Zoro's tongue swept up his neck to his ear, he couldn't put up with it anymore.

"Cut it out!" The blonde hissed as quietly as he could, wriggling enough to elbow the swordsman in the gut and hopefully stop the attack. This was all Luffy's bastard fault, and like hell if he was going to hold back on the captain when they finally got him out of the shithole and back on the ship. If Luffy thought he'd ever get snacks or seconds after this he was dead wrong, and Zoro wasn't going to be drinking booze _ever again_ if he didn't stop his fucking hands!

"No; m'bored and horny." The swordsman muttered as he pulled back, only nipping his earlobe a moment later and making him hiss. "Just shut up and let me entertain myself." Seemingly giving up on trying to push his hand down Sanji's pants – like he would have been able to with a belt, a button and zip in the way! – Zoro instead moved to just cup the cook's crotch in his hand, giving it a squeeze. And that was _it_ for him then. Fuck the fact that they were smack bang in the middle of marine headquarters, he was going to give Zoro a beating he'd never forget!

Even though they needed the element of surprise, even though Nami and Robin were counting on him…! He just couldn't put up with this shit! Angrier than he'd been in a while, he twisted his body so he was on his back, preparing to kick the lid off immediately. One kick would be all he needed like this, dammit! As he was about to do it, Zoro must have realised his intentions; grabbing his face with his hands and kissing him hard on the mouth as he flung a leg over both of the cook's, attempting to immobilise him. Surprised, he stopped all thought for a few moments as Zoro's tongue pushed into his mouth but all sense came back when a hand moved back down to try and undo his pants.

Losing the last shred of patience he owned, Sanji kicked up hard at the wood, sending splinters all over the place as he kicked a hole in the crate. Seconds later, the swordsman followed, taking the rest of the lid with him as he went flying across the room. Hearing surprised cries, Sanji sat up, lighting a cigarette as he observed all the eyes in his direction, smirking as he spotted Zoro lying on top of at least five of them. Usopp was shaking somewhere behind him and spluttering incoherent gibberish as he took a long drag, standing up in the crate and stuffing his hands into his pockets.

After the initial silence and shock, the marines started shouting and grabbing whatever weapons they could find while trying to call for back up at the same time. As Zoro got to his feet and shouted over at him Sanji just tuned him out, far more interested in the guns pointing at him. Watching them squeeze the triggers, he backflipped into the air and kicked the guns from their hands with a roundhouse before straightening again with a huge smirk on his face.

Time to work out his frustration. He'd get the idiots for this later.


End file.
